Nervous Before an Interview, Exam, or Big Talk
Your heart's pounding, your thoughts scatter, and it feels like you'll blank out and bomb. Nerves before a big event are normal — your body's gearing up to perform. The trick is getting them to work for you. Here's what to do the night before, an hour out, and in the moment.
The night before
Write down the anxious thoughts and put each one to the test. "I'm definitely going to bomb" is a prediction, not a fact. Ask yourself: what's the evidence for it, and what's the evidence against? What can you actually prepare, and what's simply out of your hands?
Nail down the specifics — your route, your materials, answers to the questions you're likely to get. Uncertainty feeds anxiety; once you know your next step, it gets easier. And protect your sleep — a tired brain has a harder time settling down.
An hour out
- Box breathing. Breathe in for 4, hold for 4, out for 4, hold for 4. A few minutes of this and your focus comes back. For more options, see our guide to breathing.
- Rename the jitters. A racing heart and butterflies are energy and readiness. Your body reacts the same way to nerves and to excitement; the difference is what you call it.
- Shift the focus off yourself and onto the task. Anxiety blows up when you're stuck on "how do I look?" Bring your attention back to what you want to say or do.
If the anxious thoughts are piling up and you want to work through your own situation — start a chat right now.
Talk it through in the chat →In the moment
If it hits right before you start, lengthen your exhale, plant your feet on the floor, and catch a couple of details around you (5-4-3-2-1 grounding). Give yourself a small pause: a sip of water and one slow breath in and out read as confidence from the outside, and they buy you a second to gather yourself.
Slipping up or losing your place is normal. Almost no one notices it the way you do.
If this keeps happening
When strong anxiety hits you before any kind of high-stakes situation, it's often driven by mind reading and catastrophizing. You can work through them and take the edge off — step by step, with CBT.
Important
This is educational self-help material and isn't a substitute for working with a professional. If anxiety before events is strong and sticks around, talk to a therapist. If you're in crisis or thinking about suicide, get help now: call or text 988 (Suicide & Crisis Lifeline), text HOME to 741741 (Crisis Text Line), or call 911 in an emergency. Available 24/7.